


television romance (you & i haven't got it)

by mikeymomoo



Series: what if i came in close? (trans george au) [2]
Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Discussion of Abortion, Gender Dysphoria, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Trans Male Character, Unplanned Pregnancy, george is pregnant and really doesn't want to be, trans george
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-13
Updated: 2019-04-13
Packaged: 2020-01-12 22:15:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18455687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mikeymomoo/pseuds/mikeymomoo
Summary: DON'T READ THIS IF A PREGNANT TRANS MAN GIVES YOU DYSPHORIA!! PLEASE DON'T TRIGGER YOURSELF FOR THE SAKE OF READING A FANFIC!-“I can’t look, Alex.” He hadn’t been able to cry since three months on T, but George could feel his eyes welling up in that moment. The tears wouldn’t fall, they never did, but knowing his body was trying somehow made him feel worse. “You do it.”George held the stick out in his fist.“Yeah. Yeah, okay.”





	television romance (you & i haven't got it)

**Author's Note:**

> AGAIN -- DONT READ THIS IF A PREGNANT TRANS MAN WILL MAKE YOU DYSPHORIC! LOOK AFTER YOURSELF!
> 
> some of my friends got into mpreg and it made me think of this au,,,trans george i dont want u to be sad u dont deserve it i am so sorry
> 
> sorry if any of the grammar is really fucked i tried
> 
> title from television romance by pale waves
> 
> enjoy xx

It was a few months into George and Will’s relationship by the time they worked up the courage to have sex for the first time. Not just fucking around — not rushed handjobs, not George sucking Will’s dick, not Will eating George out in the dark so George couldn’t see himself. Sex.

They had been lying in bed one evening, long past midnight, when George had rolled on top of Will. He didn’t want to wait any longer, dysphoria be fucking damned. It interrupted their lazy kisses, interjecting them with meaning and intent, and became something more: hips rolling into him, fingers slipping against skin.

Will offered to use a condom, as was custom with anyone he shagged, which George gratefully accepted. He had been on T for a long time now; whatever organs George had were probably shrivelled up and useless, but it was always better safe than sorry, he thought. Will flipped them both over with a smirk, and George had the most pivotal sexual experience of his life.

It was a big step for George in terms of his confidence and his dysphoria. Something about using a body part that he hated for pleasure made him feel so powerful, even as he was pinned by his throat and wrists underneath Will’s own, larger body.

They started having penetrative sex regularly after that — mostly with Will on top, but there were rare occasions when he was willing to give up that control. As the weeks went by, their fucking became more frequent, longer, sloppier. They stopped thinking about condoms; they experimented with different kinks, some of which stuck, some of which didn’t.

George didn’t notice anything was wrong until two months after Will first fucked him. He woke up one day, started brewing his morning (midday) coffee, and promptly threw up in the sink.

He didn’t even think that was unusual straight away. Will had run into the kitchen to rub his back and stroke his hair, and he felt fine as soon as it was all out. Will suggested maybe he had food poisoning from last night’s KFC, and they had left it alone.

Until the same thing happened the next day, and then again a few days later when George was back at his and Alex’s flat.

“You okay, mate?” Alex emerged from his room on hearing his friend throwing up into the toilet. George glanced back from the toilet bowl, half-smiling with his mouth closed and hoping there was no vomit around his mouth. “This is the third time you’ve been sick, right?”

George nodded. “It’s weird, Al, I’m fine most of the time, but it’s like I wake up, and my body’s like, fuck off.”

Alex hummed, leaning against the door frame as George rinsed his mouth with mouthwash, clearing the taste of bile. 

“Maybe you should go to the doctor’s.”

George grimaced in the mirror, eyes flicking to Alex’s. “Don’t like my GP.”

“I know she’s not the best, but it’s better than just suffering.” Alex sighed. “I’m making you an appointment.”

He disappeared into his bedroom, leaving George to pour some cereal into his bowl before Alex came galloping into the kitchen. “You’ve got an appointment next Tuesday. It’s not your regular GP, so hopefully they’ll be nicer.”

“Thanks.” George said, begrudgingly.

“Look after yourself, mate.”

“Fuck off.”

The vomiting continued most days when George woke up; the stress on his throat was the worst part. It burned even when he wasn’t throwing up from the bile passing through it, and he was drinking so much water before bed to try to dilute it that he was waking up to piss every few hours.

George was exhausted, and so was Will. It woke him up, too, when George got up in the middle of the night, and the pair of them were nothing but thrilled when Tuesday rolled around.

However, George left his GP’s office with a sick feeling in his gut nothing like what he’d been experiencing for the last fortnight. He had a tight throat, a pounding heart, and absolutely no fucking idea what to do.

He was pregnant.

George had thought it impossible. He hadn’t had a period in over a year. Of course, it wasn’t confirmed yet. The doctor — thankfully understanding of his gender and situation — had instructed him to take a pregnancy test, but he wasn’t sure he could bring himself to go and buy one. He could order one online, of course, but that would require researching brands and waiting for it to arrive, and he just wanted to  _ know _ so that he could make a plan.

This wasn’t something he could tell Will, George realised with a jolt. Not yet, at least. Will had his head wrapped around everything about George now, but this would throw such a spanner in the works in any developing relationship, let alone a gay relationship.

James wasn’t an option, either, and neither was Fraser. Neither of them know a whole lot about being pregnant  _ or _ transgender, let alone both at once. This left him, George supposed, with Alex. He was something of a rock through any complications with his and Will’s relationship, so really, Alex was the obvious place to turn.

_ George: you around? _

Alex replied within twenty seconds.

_ Alex: yh not like i ever do anything lol what’s up _

_ George: this is gonna sound weird but i need you to buy a pregnancy test _

Alex left the message on read for a full two minutes while George ordered and got in an Uber. 

_ Alex: u dont have to explain now, but when u get home u better _

_ Alex: heading to shop now and then i’ll come home. do we need milk? _

George breathed a sigh of relief. Alex wasn’t going to be difficult; he was going to treat it like this was a perfectly normal occurrence and like George didn’t feel like an utter freak of nature.

—

Alex unlocked the door and gently placed the green plastic bag on the coffee table in front of George wordlessly. He sat down in the armchair, waiting for the older man to look at him.

“What’s happened, mate?” He asked when George eventually made eye contact. “I mean… I’ve got a pretty good idea, but- you know.”

George sighed, grimaced, and leaned forward to grab the test out of the bag. “You bought milk, then.”

“Yeah. Don’t avoid the question.”

“I’ll answer it in…” George looked down at the packet.  _ Effective results in under two minutes!  _ “Two minutes.”

Peeing on that stupid stick was one of the hardest things George had ever done. The fear of peeing in public mens’ loos was a walk in the park compared to finding out if there was the start of a baby inside him. Even considering that possibility made George want to puke his guts out. Puke the fucking embryo out if it was there. Embryo? Or would it be a foetus by now? George didn’t know, and he wished he didn’t have to think about that.

As he waited for the two minutes to pass, George realised he didn’t even know if he really agreed with abortions. When someone had been sexually assaulted, then, yeah, of course that would be fine if it was what they wanted. But this wasn’t sexual assault. This was just George being stupid and not knowing enough about the effects of HRT.

Alex knocked on the door. “George, mate?”

“Yeah.” George’s voice sounded hollow, and it made him want to cry.

“How are you, uh… Can I come in?”

George didn’t reply, but he’d left the door unlocked, so Alex opened it and stood in the doorway. “What does it say?”

George locked eyes with him. Two minutes was up, Alex was right. Still, he couldn’t bring himself to look at the little piece of plastic in his palm.

“I can’t look, Alex.” He hadn’t been able to cry since three months on T, but George could feel his eyes welling up in that moment. The tears wouldn’t fall, they never did, but knowing his body was trying somehow made him feel worse. “You do it.”

George held the stick out in his fist. 

“You’ve pissed on it-” Alex caught himself. That wasn’t important; he was being a cunt. “Yeah. Yeah, okay.”

He took the stick from George’s shaking fingers. Looked down. Read the result; licked his lips.

“Can I…” Alex took a breath. “Are you ready for me to say?”

George could feel his heart in his mouth and his fingers buzzing. If it was negative, Alex would have been happy for him. The twist to Alex’s mouth was not happy.

“I’m- I’m pregnant. Aren’t I?”

Alex looked up at George, took in the tears in his eyes, and felt his own burn. “Yeah,” He said softly after a long pause. “Yeah, you are. I’m- I’m so sorry.”

“Not your fault, is it?” George tried to laugh, but it was a choked noise drenched in mourning and devastation. “I’m the fucker with a- a  _ baby  _ inside me, aren’t I?”

“No, Georgie-”

“Don’t call me that.”

“Sorry.” Alex winced.  He moved forwards to sit on the side of the bath and pull George into his chest. “It’s not your fault either, man.”

George shook his head and buried it into Alex’s shoulder. “Fucking is. Fucking idiot, you know I am. What kind of stupid cunt doesn’t use a fucking condom? Me, that’s who. Stupid. Stupid fucking idiot.”

Alex grimaced. “You’re not. Love you, George.” He wrapped a hand around the back of George’s head, feeling the smaller man physically give up, slumping against him like a ragdoll.

“What the fuck am I gonna tell Will?” 

“I don’t know.” Alex’s voice was quiet; he wished there was anything he could do to actually help the situation.

“Great, yeah, thanks Alex.” George laughed again, deadpan and dull. “He’s going to break up with me.”

Alex pulled back away from him, shaking his head. “No, George, I’m not fucking having that from you. I know this sucks, but Will fucking loves you. He’s not a fucking cunt, is he? He’s going to help you through this, and you know it.”

George followed Alex’s warmth, trying to stay close to him, and nodded, and tear finally dripping down his reddened cheek. “I know.”

“I’m going to call him, he’s gonna come over, I’m going to leave you alone, and you’re gonna sort it out together. That sound okay?”

George nodded. “Don’t-” He wiped his nose. “Don’t leave me until he gets here?”

“Course not.”

Alex phoned Will, telling him not to worry but that he needed to get to the flat as soon as possible; it was urgent. Will, to his credit, arrived in record time. Judging from the speed and his rosy face, Alex guessed he’d run the whole way there.

“In here!” Alex called when he heard the front door open. 

Will collapsed into the bathroom almost instantly, and, seeing George propped up by Alex and in tears, strode across the floor to kneel and take his boyfriend into his own arms immediately.

“Shh, shh. Baby, what’s wrong?” George let out a wracked sob at the word. “Hey, hey, hey, George, what is it?” Will looked up to Alex, frowning. “Did I do something?”

“Can I tell him?” Alex asked, staring at the side of George’s head, waiting for the nod that came a moment later. He kicked the pregnancy test to Will from where it had fallen from  his hand to the floor. 

Will stared at it over George’s back for three minutes. Alex counted. He didn’t for a moment lose his grip around George’s ribs, or stop stroking his thumbs comfortingly over his spine.

“Okay.” He licked his lips. “Okay. We can deal with this. Not like- you don’t have to kill- terminate it. I didn’t mean deal with it like that. I just mean, we can handle the situation however you want, babe- George. Angel.”

Will sighed.

“I’m going to fuck up a lot with this, okay?” Will gently pulled on George’s hair to make him look up at him. George didn’t open his eyes. “And I’m going to try not to, but I’m not perfect, so you’re going to have to help me learn. But I’m going to be here for you however you need me to be, and we’re going to get through it.”

George blinked his eyes half open, a frown deep set in his forehead. He nodded.

“I love you.”

Unable to make sounds leave his throat that weren’t pathetic to his own ears, George tapped over his own heart, and then over Will’s.

“I know, angel” Will nodded, clutching George back to his chest. “I know.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading i might (will) do a sequel to this part but i wanted to get some of it out and done
> 
> pls comment n kudos love u bye xx


End file.
